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Sometimes when I'm shitfaced I do silly things. Like this. That's the first thing you should know.
The second thing you should know is that I'm not a blonde anymore (thanks Clairol). That's something to note because I was a blonde for close to five years.
The third thing you should know is that I tend to be an asshole who can't ever muster up the courage to meet people in real life. Now, that's not because I'm ugly (not a dog face anyway?), or because I'm fat (curvy, more than swingers Personals in Okay average but definitely not obese - fuck you very much BMI). But rather because I've been fucked over one two many times (not really, it just sounds better to say that; long story is long) and I just don't really like putting myself out there. (I'm not shy though? Not generally? But I think it's more the fact that I'm not really a risk taker when it comes to personal things.)
The fourth thing you should know is that I tend to be a "bro". And by "bro" I mean, I tend to be the token girl in a group of men. This is probably because I don't like bullshit, tend to be on the sloppier side of the bleach, don't get along with women (primarily because I find them incredibly confusing, even being one), and something else but I'm too wasted to figure it out.
The fifth thing you should know is that I'm not sure what I'm looking for. A date? A friend? A fuck buddy? A roommate? A boyfriend/girlfriend/smurffriend? So if you're down for that you should email me, make solid plans with me because I will pussy out, and then be one of those things - but not a dog. I'm not looking for a dog. I've got one.
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